The other day I was emailing a friend/colleague who has been struggling lately. He and I have found over the past 15 years of working together that we share some similarities...we are both biologists with creative tendencies which is a rarity in this field (he is an amazing artist and photographer)...we both suffer from depression and anxiety...and so on. This past winter, he suffered not only some serious health setbacks, but some professional ones as well and he withdrew from everybody except his wife and daughter. I didn't hear from him for 7-8 months. I was anxious for him...but I know the pattern well and knew that when he was ready, he'd contact me.
A few weeks ago, he finally reached out -- asking for some advice and wanting to know how I had been doing (he knew of my work with mel -- many years ago, he was the one that suggested that I may benefit from a therapist if I found the right fit). As I was typing, from one friend gaining her footing to another trying to do the same, I noticed a bird on the post beside me singing his little heart out. I watched and photographed him for several minutes knowing that I would attach these pictures to that email. Because I realized...I now have moments where I know that kind of joy. And I hope my friend can find it again soon as well.
Seemed a bit serendipitous. If you believe in that sort of thing...
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Now playing: If You Want To Sing Out by Cat Stevens
(and of course this song came to my head watching the little guy...)
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So glad you reconnected, I know you were concerned. I love the singing bird; a wren perhaps. It makes me smile.
ReplyDeleteYes -- and of course not quite as patient as I led you to believe in this blog post as you well know. He's still struggling a lot but at least he is reaching out. And yes, that bird sang by me, popping from post to post, for about 25 minutes. I just sat there watching with a stupid grin on my face as Cat Steven's song played through in my head in concert with the little guy!
ReplyDeleteBirds in the spring - love them! It's such a fierce singing, like a compulsion to get all this noise out of a tiny body (of course, the biological drive being what it is, the need to scream look at me makes sense). They remind me of a young child's intensity in learning to do something "I can do it!!!! Don't!!!! Let me do it!!!!" Fierce!!
ReplyDeleteGlad your friend reached out - I can relate to the waiting and knowing when the time is right it will happen ;-)
while I do know the biologically driven need to sing out, I also just think 'joy' when I see it. although maybe it should be 'compulsive joy' instead! ;) and yes...I never thought of it in that manner but i can see the similarities with a child's intensity!
Deletei have found through the years that only those people that understand and accept that sometimes I just need to drop off the grid will remain in my circle of friends. it only seems fair that I return that favor.
Waiting is so hard. I'm glad your friend is to the point he is ready to reach out to you again. My husband is bipolar and suffers from anxiety. I know how futile it is to try to push someone into something before they are ready. You were wise to give him time, and a good friend to be there when he was at the point he wanted contact. As for the bird, serendipitous sounds like the perfect word. Wonderful pictures!
ReplyDeleteIt's good you understand this about your husband. I wonder, if I didn't have the same issue, if I would be so understanding and patient? I would hope so, but my experience is that few folks really understand the need to just step away from it all sometimes...
DeleteI totally believe in that sort of thing! These bird photos are melting my heart. Cheers to joy! So good to know you are feeling it.
ReplyDeleteI had a feeling you would. I love these photos too...they make me smile every time I look at them!
DeleteI just saw a little sparrow really belting it out and thought of you. :)
ReplyDeleteaawww...I'm glad!
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